Still Life with Cats

Seriously, I have nothing to write. I am so unbelievably boring. Adam asked me yesterday, "What happened to the fun Erin I used to know?" What happened indeed. To prove how boring I am, here is what I did today, and most likely any Tuesday...

10AM: Woke up, played with cats, yelled at cats for being too aggressively playful.

11AM: Showered, sang in shower, got ready for work.

12:40PM: Left the house late to catch my bus.

12:45PM: Called work to tell them I was going to be late.

12:45-1:05: Waited at bus stop.

1:05-2:15: Rode bus and read. Contemplated atomic theory.

2:15-10:30PM: Took people's money, unpacked boxes, answered phones, shelved books, farted around, went to the bathroom, ate lunch, goofed around...you know, work.

10:30-11:30PM: Rode bus, read, contemplated why cheese is so yummy.

11:45PM: Tidied, played with cats, turned on computer, washed dishes.

See, aren't you glad I don't write this shit down everyday...you would die of boredom.

Little Kids in Bookstores

Today I was walking down one of the aisles at work when I heard a little boy* saying "Barack Obama". If you've never heard a little kid say "Barack Obama", well it's just about the cutest thing ever. So I'm all set to just adore this kid when I come around the corner and see that he isn't looking at a book about/by Barack Obama, it was a book by Randy Jackson...you know American Idol Randy Jackson.

Which led me to reminisce on another occasion at my old bookstore...

We used to sell these little Gandhi, stuffed dolls. One time a kid* came in and said, "Look Mom, a monkey!"

Wow! Little kids are racist!

How about a little diversity parents!

* both kids were white

Why Sometimes I Think it Might Be Better to Live With Other Humans and Not Just Cats

On Sunday I woke up and it was snowing like I have never seen before. The flakes were the size of tea cup saucers. I had no idea that it was supposed to snow, and for a brief second I thought it was ash. The thought actually ran through my head that Mt. Rainier had exploded and we were all going to die. I nearly made it to the telephone to call my mom (much like the time a pack of javelinas came up to my apartment window in Tucson...what's she going to do...shoo javelinas through the telephone?). As I was going for the phone, to no doubt panic my mother with volcanic visions, I thought to myself, "hm, it's cold in here. Could those white things falling to the ground, possibly, just maybe, be snow?" Turns out they were. And I could have avoided a few seconds of sheer terror if I only lived with an actually person instead of two cats who find shoelaces and licking their own butts more interesting than extreme meterological events or terrifying (fictional) seismic occcurances.

Wow. Super Depressing

Yahoo! has a feature on their homepage showing the the top ten searches of the day. Today #10 was "unemployment benefits". I think that's the first time an entry hasn't been a celebrity or diet plan. Yikes. Times be tough, friends.

For Your Consideration

Cutest animal ever...

The baby chinchilla.

Weekend Update

I've thought long and hard about this. I love my job and my bookstore and above all, I love the customers that shop there and keep us in business even though they could go to that dreaded online bookstore and save "scads" of money. Unfortunately, most of my good material comes from work. So, as a disclaimer, none of these anecdotes represent a particular individual, it is just my bitchy, self-righteous, condescending view of the world. Without further ado, I present, Things That Annoyed Me This Weekend...

-It snowed, and everyone who came to the cash registers had to tell me that it was snowing.

-Nobody had any idea what they wanted, one example...
Customer: Do you have any books by Tony Atwood?
Me: What's the title?
C: I don't know.
typing...
M: I don't see anything, could it be Anthony?
C: I don't know.
typing...
M: I don't see anything listed for a Tony or Anthony Atwood. Do you know anything about it, any words in the title or what kind of book it is?
C: No.

-People could not get over how adorable their kids were. They kept having them pay, which, let me tell you, taking money from kids is like pulling teeth. They're shy, won't look at you, are always looking at their parents when I ask a question. It's like I'm trying to complete the transaction with their parents only through a very unreliable telephone with a time delay like they're on the moon. And the bills are always crumpled in a wad, and they can't take the change without dropping it because their hands are too damn small. Just so you know, we don't think it's adorable, we think it's annoying.

-A man complained about my t-shirt which says, "vote," with a drawing of hands. He asked me why we should vote and then proceeded to spout out every negative, cynical argument against voting, finishing with, "Of course I voted, but I wasn't proud of it." Astounding.

-While going to the bathroom a little girl about 6 or 7 peeped at me through the gap between the door. And it wasn't just a look to see if the stall was empty (she saw me go in), it was peeping. The best part was her mother who was standing there watching her peep. She didn't say anything to stop her, didn't say anything to me when I came out, or when I rang them up at the cash registers a few minutes later. Just a little tip for all you parents out there, don't let your kids spy on people going to the bathroom.

Where Have You Been?

Well, really it was I who was missing. Sorry I haven't been keeping up to date but I've been busy/boring. Busy because it was my birthday and mi madre was in town, and boring because nothing seems to happen to me. I know my blogging absence has led some of you to curse me for not providing your morning entertainment and still others of you to freak out and figure I had been hit by a bus (although in their defense I was abnormally silent on all fronts be they email, texting, voicemail or smoke signals). So in an effort to apologize, and get you all on my good side again, I present... FREAKISHLY ADORALE ANIMALS...



























See. Don't you love me just as much as you did before?

My Night With Junot Diaz

Because I am the slowest blogger ever, I am finally getting around to this. Last Tuesday some coworkers and I went to hear Junot Diaz speak. He is the author of the Pulitzer Prize winning, The Brief and Wondrous Life of Oscar Wao. For those of you who don't know my views on the book, here is my review...

http://www.goodreads.com/review/show/32211602.

So needless to say, I'm not much of a fan. I will say that the book is incredibly well written, I could never in a million years even dream of writing such a book. But still, I hated it. And, being the open-minded person that I am, I wanted to hear what the author had to say. I wasn't going just to get more riled up (like I sometimes do when I turn on Bill O'reilly). I seriously wanted to see if maybe we had all misread the book. Maybe it wasn't just a mini-memoir of emigrating to the US. Maybe it was the feminist commentary that I so desperately wanted it to be.

Another link, here is the Stranger's take on the evening....

http://slog.thestranger.com/slog/archives/2009/02/25/reading_last_night_junot_d_a

Given the evening that I witnessed, with a more jaded eye than our friends at the Stranger, Junot Diaz is a charming, intelligent, quick-witted fellow. He's very funny and something about his nervous speaking tick is so endearing that I wanted to pick him up and squeeze him and put him in my pocket and take him home. But, I also think he's an arrogant asshole. And perhaps that's my bias talking (I'm afraid there's no clear-cut reporting here, the Stranger is enamored and I am enraged, I'm sorry if you were looking for just the facts, but you won't get them here). From the moment he stepped onstage he was belittling the presenter, whom I'll admit was a little frosty, but maybe rightly so.

Part of my argument for disliking him that night has to do with spending too many hours with pretentious creative writing students in God-awful pretentious creative writing workshops, and part of it has to do with Junot Diaz's propensity for swearing. Maybe all the middle-aged people in the audience thought that the various "fuck you"s were edgy, but I just saw them as a front. I myself swear... a lot, but not like that. I'm sorry, but that was a stage act, a persona. That "edginess" that had everyone nervously giggling and applauding was nothing more than a ruse. A ruse to say, "I won the Pulitzer?! Well I don't really give a shit. You know, because I'm so street."

So, I still don't like Junot Diaz, and no, my reporting is not "fair and balanced," but that's the way I feel. And oddly, something in that visceral feeling makes me think that the Junot Diazes of the world would approve.

PS. More to come on the feminist argument that Mr. Diaz started by claiming that men cannot be feminists... are you intriuged? I am!

PPS. I'm not very open minded. I an the first person to admit that.

Um...

There sure have been a lot of cat entries lately. Please, if you are a stranger or a long-lost friend, understand that there is more to me than my cats. Things like reading and watching movies, knitting and learning how to juggle. See how diverse I am. I'm not a crazy cat lady. Why, just tonight I completed a completely cat-free filing of my taxes (though I did wonder if they would count as dependents...sadly, no).

And, well if you do know me, I guess it's probably too late to try and convince you otherwise.

Everyone's a Critic

My cats like to supervise everything I do. And I mean everything...






Here is Brody
supervising
me while I cook.











Here he is again
supervising my
push-ups.







This is Opal
supervising
craft time.








And finally, Opal
supervising me
while I go to the
bathroom.