Dear The Killers, You're stupid.

So, I watched your stupid music video.  It's so stupid.

Like I wanted to see an amazing and beautiful video recapping all your other amazing and beautiful videos.  With a super gorgeous, lady actress (apparently from the Glee show) pretending to be Brandon Flowers...that's so stupid and not hot at all.

And then you packed it full of references of shit that only Victims (superfans) would get.

Stupid.

And, seriously...giving me way more Ronnie, Mark, and DAVE...just like I asked you to?

I hate you.

Can't you do anything right?

I'm SO glad you're going on hiatus.  I honestly can't take any more of your crap.  Why don't you take this time to think about how you could possibly be a little more awesome.

Also, stop tweeting shit like this.  If you could not dedicate your stupidly amazing and beautiful video to your most ardent supporters...that would be great.

Jerks.

New Killers' Music Video!

Don't worry.

I'll watch it.

517 times.

And I'll let you know how it is.

Which, let's face it...it's probably awesome.

How adorable was Brandon Flowers this week?

I'm glad you asked...

Here he is being adorable on some sort of mass transit.

***

This is him being an adorable groupie, talking about the new Morrissey Autobiography given to him by an interviewer (it's currently only available in the UK...come on Penguin!) :

“It's gotta be pretty good, huh?” he says distractedly as he paws through Morrissey's Autobiography. “So it's from his mouth… must have been working on it for a long time… shit,” says the 32-year-old with something like awe. “It's big. Damn. It's cool… Trying to see if there's any pictures I've never seen… His mom was pretty…”

I knew he was a fan, I just didn't know he was such a teenage girl about it.  He talks about Morrissey the way I talk about him. "Trying to see if there's any pictures I've never seen."  I've never felt closer to him.

***

Brando. Adorable. At the Maida Vale BBC studios.

***

B-Flow being adorable with Ronnie during the Zane Lowe BBC Radio 1 interview:

Ronnie: says something mean to Zane.

Zane: Come on now, there's no need...come on, Beardy.

Brandon: *out-of-control giggling*  BEARDY!  *more giggling*

***

Here he is being adora-...actually, no.  This isn't adorable. This is him being ridiculously, super hot. Like, criminally hot. Someone arrest him. Now.

And while we're at it...here is his ass being super hot.  Can I get an APB on that ass?

***

Ok, let's be serious for a second, while this post, and most everything I say about Brandon Flowers (and The Killers) centers on how adorable/attractive/super hot he is (they are), I would like to clarify that though he is (they are) super hot, it really is about the songs and the music and the band. Honest. Their hotness level is just a seriously, awesome bonus.

As proof, I offer these photos:

I was a fan in the very beginning...when he looked like this. Ugh.

Not a super fan, mind you, just a normal-person fan. I had a copy of Hot Fuss. Actually, it was a burned copy courtesy of my brother. I still have that burned cd....though I did finally buy a legit copy this year. B-Flow's wearing more makeup in that second photo than all the make-up I have ever worn in my entire life. See, it really isn't just about his super-hotness.

***

Ok, last adorable thing, and then I'm done: 

I remember hearing Read My Mind for the first time on the radio in 2007, back in Tucson. It was late on a week night, and my friend and I were driving home from a run around Reid Park. When the song was over, I told her we were stopping at Zia Records (this totally awesome record store that was always open until midnight). I needed that song, and I needed it immediately. It's the song that made them my favorite band. It's still my favorite Killers song, and will probably always be for that reason. Here is what Brandon Flowers said about it this week while reviewing their upcoming best of record:

"I love Read My Mind...When we play it live, you can tell it means a lot to people, and that's definitely one of the songs that attracts people to the band."

It's like he can...read my mind! BAHAHAHAHHAAAAAHA!

Anyway, here's a link to the new acoustic version of Read My Mind.  I don't know how to embed it in the blog, but please, go listen. It's beautiful. On the other hand, if you don't want the Titanic-sized obsession I have, maybe you should avoid it. But, if you have a slightly less addictive personality- it is REALLY nice.

***

OH WAIT! One more thing. Seriously, this is it.
Here he is being adorable and only slightly freaked out by fans asking him for hugs...

I'm really glad I just shook his hand and didn't try to hug him. 

Good decision making on my part. Wise choice. 

Yeah, totally happy I didn't ask for a hug...

NO I'M NOT!!!!!! WHY DIDN'T I ASK FOR A HUG?!? 

He clearly gives them freely!

Biggest mistake of my life.

Alright, new life goal: hug that adorable mother f*cker.

I don't care how much it freaks him out.

I don't.

On favorite Books & FAVORITE Books: A review of The Goldfinch in two parts

Part One

I have favorite books, and then I have FAVORITE books.  A lot of my favorite books represent different genres, and types of books.  Sometimes they're a series, where it's not simply one book, but the entire collection that has made them favorites (Harry Potter, Ramona, The Moomins).  A lot of times my favorite books are favorites because I think they're beautifully written, or unique and interesting, or I just really like them.  Some of my favorite books include Little Women, Tinkers, Jonathan Strange and Mr. Norrell, A Short History of Nearly Everything, Moby Dick, and more recently, Amor and Psycho.  I have a lot of favorite books.

But FAVORITE books...they are a different thing entirely.  These are books that I finish and clutch to my chest, unwilling to let go.  Books that are always well written, but with something more about them that simply stirs me.  Books that I hesitate to recommend to friends because I worry I will think less of those friends should they not feel the same way I do.  These are the books that induce the severest cases of PPD (Post Potter Depression- the feeling one gets after finishing the latest Harry Potter book, knowing that the next Harry Potter book is years away from being released, and realizing that no other book will ever make one happy again).

And these FAVORITES are the books that make me believe, just a little bit, in magic.

FAVORITE books are perfect and painful.  And the list is much shorter, and doesn't seem to fluctuate much.  The Shipping News, The Amazing Adventures of Kavalier and Clay, and Stoner.  Those are my FAVORITES.  Today, I'm adding The Goldfinch by Donna Tartt to the list.

***

Allow me an anecdote to convey the depths of my feelings for this book.

On Monday, heading home from work, I checked Facebook and saw that The Killers had surprise "leaked" their new song.  It's not something I could hear on my phone with any real clarity, so I decided to wait until I was home to listen.  If you are at all unaware of my rather ardent feelings for The Killers, please, just peruse the Killers tag on this blog.  It's a serious, sometimes debilitating obsession.  Actually, maybe don't peruse the Killers tag, it's a bit embarrassing.

But on Monday, heading home from work, I also had just 60 pages left of The Goldfinch (an 800 page book that I tore through in the better part of a week).  Funnily enough, I had started reading it on my recent trip to see The Killers in concert.

SO, when I got home, I curled up in bed and I read.  I finished The Goldfinch.  And I cried.  And then I read the summary and blurbs on the back of the book, and the letter from the editor inside (I was reading an advance copy).  I read the author bio, and the author thanks section.  I went back and read some of my favorite passages and then I read the end again.  And it was 2 hours later until I even remembered there was a new Killers song to listen to.

This book erased The Killers from my mind. This book has powers. This book frightens me.

***

A bit more on the actual book to come.

Post Concert Depression

Everything is the worst. Nothing will ever be awesome again. Not even Halloween, my favorite holiday, can make me feel better. Seattle sucks. I want to be in Las Vegas! I need Las Vegas! I am Las Vegas! Ok...that may be overdoing it a bit. But just a little.

Let me clarify: I want to relive this last weekend forever. Forever.

This is what I want my life to be: constantly listening to awesome bands, and eating awesome food, and hanging out with awesome friends, and soaking up awesome sun underneath awesomely enormous, desert skies. The neon buzz, as background to all of it.

Oh, and I would like to relive meeting Brandon Flowers over and over and over and over and over again.

But I can't.

I'm back home in Seattle.With nothing to look forward to. It's turning to winter and rain and grey. I don't get to listen to live bands everyday. There's not nearly enough neon (that element really is poorly represented in the Emerald City). The Killers are going on hiatus for 3 years. And there is a serious shortage of Brandon Flowers here.

See?!?!!! Everything sucks.

But I console myself with a new found appreciation of Beck, and a rapidly increasing love of Vampire Weekend. These bands! This music! They break my heart and ruin my life. And I keep falling for it.

But what can I do? They make me feel better. But just a little.

The Killers: Update

In order to avoid all the endless Killers posts that seem to be happening, I'm consolidating them into one GIANT post. It's totally convenient because you can easily find all the super important news about the world's greatest band, or you can easily skip the entire post if you are (more than likely) not interested.

***

They released a new song earlier this month. Some of you may have heard me talking about it...endlessly. Or if you're a coworker, you might have heard the song itself. Over the store stereo system. About 67 times.

Here is the beautiful video for it, though only 25% as beautiful as it could have been since there is only one Killer in it. Someday I want to see a Killers video that stars only Dave. 

Of note: all the attractive young people, pretty Vegas lights, and some classic B.Flow moves you should probably check out and maybe learn. Best part of the video, (and song, for that matter) at 3:46.

I made a chart about how I feel about the song...

***

I mean, COME ON! How could you leave this beautiful bastard out of the video?!? You're telling me, that's not marketable?

***

Remember when I told you about Ronnie being super awesome? Well, here's Brando also being super awesome. 

***

Last weekend I pretty much lost my will to live when I learned that Mark wasn't with the rest of the band for the Asian leg of their tour...and they had a fill in/understudy/whatever you call the person that isn't Mark (his name is Jake...yeah, I know Fake Mark's name, so what? he tours with them anyway, so it's not really that stalker-y).

Some people said to me, "Well at least he's not your favorite."

Let me be clear, while it's obvious that I may have different kinds of love for the various Killers, I DO love them all. And if one of them leaves, they just won't be The Killers anymore. I mean, where would they be without Mark's sweet, sweet bass lines?! Tell me that!

Anyway, it seems Mark hasn't broken up with them...at least that's what they claim. I just hope he's better by October 27th.

***

ONE MONTH 'TIL VEGAS!!!!!

***

My new computer background.

I REGRET NOTHING!!!!

Battleborn...No, not THAT Battle Born

I know, you think I read this book because of its title.  Well, I'll have you know that I read this book before I had my Killers breakdown.  And I bought this book way back, last fall, when The Killers were just my favorite band (and not my only reason for living). And further, I was only slightly tempted by the fact that both the new Killers album, and the book had the same title...I was all the way tempted by the cover of the book. It's SOOOOOOO pretty!

If you were one of my former Goodreads friends, you may have read this review already.  Well, here's a spruced up version I wrote for my monthly staff pick at the store in an attempt to actually sell the damn thing. I agonized over this review the first time...and I agonized over it again the second time. Anyways, here it is.

***

Battleborn by Claire Vaye Watkins

Okay, halfway through this review, you're gonna ask yourself, "Why is she even recommending this book?"  Just hear me out, okay?

Another reviewer somewhere said, "Watkins shows promise." I think that's a great way to describe this debut collection. I liked many of these stories, absolutely LOVED one or two (and I mean loved with every fiber of my being-LOVED), and was frustrated by the rest.

Sometimes I really trusted Watkins, was drawn in by her obvious need to find hope in the hopeless. But then her genuineness would slip away to reveal a different author, a less confident author, an author working too hard at being provocative. Sure, sex and violence and drugs and prostitution and infidelity are "edgy"; or to use that horribly overused and demeaning adjective (but only actually used to describe a female author when she dares enter the "realm" of "male" writers)..."gritty" (please note all " " in that last sentence are meant to be read as enthusiastically, sarcastic air quotes...and sorry for all the parenthesis). But a story doesn't become provocative simply by their inclusion and in truth, she's at her most provocative and genuine, when her subjects aren't so "edgy". Not surprisingly, Watkins really shines when she isn't working so hard.  Most of the time I just wanted her to get out of her own way, because she does have such...you know, promise.  So try Graceland and The Diggings for some phenomenal writing.

However, what she does do well, she does really well. Her characters are flawed and unlikable in just the right ways, her subjects unique, and sometimes her words simply soar. But what she does best is write about the desert. For as much as a story would be pissing me off, it would be dragging me in with the smell of creosote; the shimmer of heat waves; and that great, big, western sky stretching on for miles. The desert does something to a person, burrows in deep and never leaves. And to be able to capture that and the raw ache and emptiness of missing the desert when not there; that, I find truly remarkable. Watkins is a child of the desert and she writes it well.

I read these stories compulsively, and they are really very good...and if the first part of this review doesn't indicate that it's because I think they could be so much better, I think she could be really great. I DO think she's phenomenal, and she certainly knows her way around a sentence, AND this is the best new book I've read all year. UGH! What this terribly muddled review is trying to tell you is to read this book; it might make you crazy, it will make you cry, and you may just slam it shut from time to time. But you're gonna be compelled to open it back up, again and again. You won't be able to stay away. People, this is your chance to get in on the ground floor of something big...Claire Vaye Watkins is gonna be huge.

***

And now, won't you please enjoy the song Battle Born, off the album Battle Born, while you read my review of the completely unrelated book, Battleborn. Bonus: if you watch the whole video (and you really should) or if you fast forward to 8:44, you'll see the moment that Brandon Flowers and I brush hands...and the world was never the same again.

If You Like Boat Shoes...You'll LOVE The Killers

I've been trying to explain to people how awesome The Killers are. Mostly because they are awesome, and no one should be deprived of their awesomeness, but also because it'd be nice to have someone actually interested in what I have to say about them. So far it's an uphill battle.

The other day, my attempts were focused on Carrie, who likes boat shoes. And I told her about this interview a long time ago with Brandon Flowers wearing boat shoes, basically trying to convince her that he is the reason boat shoes are so hot right now; and therefore, she should love The Killers. Sound logic, I know.

A few days later, I sent her a picture of Brandon Flowers and the aforementioned boat shoes. Here's how it goes...

Autocomplete- convenient, in that you don't have to type all the letters; and yet inconvenient, in that it shows you just how crazy you have actually gone.

And now, back to studying (Yes, I'm still blaming this mostly on the Bar Exam...mostly), but before I go...Baby Bflow and his boat shoes...

Congrats, Bflow. You did it, and it only took a decade or so.

Dave Appreciation Post

I asked Carrie and Trish tonight, "What if after the Bar exam, I don't like The Killers anymore?" To which
Carrie said something to the effect of, "I'm sure you'll be fine."

At any rate, in case the unthinkable happens, and this was all a fever dream of stress and insanity...here is a Dave appreciation post.  I just can't get enough Dave lately.

***

"Sometimes it's annoying when I'll be doing a guitar solo and some people would rather watch Brandon drink a bottle of water." - Dave Keuning

From a 2005 NME interview:
Interviewer: "What brand of eyeliner do you use? Have you ever thought of bringing out a Killers brand to sell as merchandise?"
Brandon: (dead pan)  "I use a Sharpie."
Dave:  "Brandon! Now someone will try that and ruin their eyes!"

Always looking out for us...even when we don't watch his guitar solos.

PS. How excited am I about this GIF thing?!???!

I guess I like Ricky Gervais now

Yeah, fuck you.

Can't stop listening to this

This remix is trance inducing, and calming, and it makes me fly. It's my bar study theme song. 4:51 to the end is the big payoff, but you need those 4 previous minutes to really appreciate it. Magic. Just hit play, and go about your day.

 

 You're welcome.

Bus Readers, K edition

This afternoon's bus ride home was brought to you by the letter K.

• One fellow was reading a book about mountain climbing, the chapter he was reading: K2
• Another gentleman was reading a Phillip K. Dick novel
• The woman next to me was reading her Kindle (lame, I judged her)
• and I was reading my new NME magazine cover story on The Killers

I obviously had the best reading material. At the very least, mine was the most beautiful.

Here's a funny story about the letter K. A few months back, when I was trying to be a little less crazy about The Killers (instead of my current and more comfortable state as full-on Killers historian...stalker) I was hanging out with Carrie, and determined not to bring up the subject of the world's greatest band.  Here's how the conversation went:

C: What'd you do today?

E: I returned some books to the library...I lied, I was returning cds.

C: I love that you lie about it and then tell the truth in the same sentence.

E: Well, returning books sounds more intellectual than returning cds.

C: Were they Killers cds?

E: No.

C: ...

E: THEY WEREN'T!

C: Were they cds of bands that Brandon Flowers likes?

E: ...

C: Those are Killers cds!

E: No, they aren't and besides...(enter some long-ass story about The Killers' musical influences here)...Man! I wasn't going to talk about them tonight! It's your fault.  How did you do that?

C: Me?!? All I have to mention is their name and you've got a new story about their favorite foods, or what happened at some recent show, or what Brandon Flowers said in an interview...hell, all I have to do is say the letter K.

She's right. It's a powerful letter.

Colbert-ifications

I haven't been around for a year or so...a couple of things.

I still love Stephen. I know a lot of you were worried that in the haze of my seemingly-sudden-onset, ever-increasing, restraining order-inducing feelings for The Killers... that I had forgotten about Stephen.

Never.

Whether or not there will be tickets to The Report for my August trip to the Big Apple is a constant source of anxiety and worry. I will forever love him. Always.

And how annoying was John Mellencamp on Thursday's episode? Why do people think they can go on the show and upstage my Stephen. They can't. No one can. Unless you are among the small population of inherently awesome, or Stephen was in love with you as a child (Dolly Parton), trying to upstage him just makes you look sad and irrelevant. But perhaps that is an accurate description of John Mellencamp at this point. Also, in the same episode, how adorable was Stephen King?!?? So adorable!... and that takes some saying on my part. (if you click that last link, please understand that there is nothing in this world I regret more than defending Stephenie Meyer)

Just wanted to clarify some things. Mainly, I still love Stephen Colbert. Here's a little clip of why that will forever be true.
WHAT UP, SOUP?!!!?!?!? Pure genius.

Here's another clip.

Shit. Well, did you really think I would could post something without them? Did you?

Yup...It's a Killers Blog

This is adorable for so many reasons.  Mostly Ronnie's slight confusion, and Brando's perfect timing.

Killer Mail

I got something in the mail today from a Killer.

I might have peed a little when I saw his name.  

And before you ask; yes, I ordered it and yes, 

I knew it was coming. I still might have peed a little.

Why I love this Band

From a Twitter interview feed of The Killers responding to "fan" questions... Ronnie Vannucci's actual answer. God, he's a magnificent bastard.

Also, while you weren't looking, this might have turned into a blog about The Killers.

Don't Get Excited

Ok, I'm not saying this is actually happening again. All I'm saying is, "Hey, I'm still alive. And now with Goodreads lost forever to the evil Empire...I need a place to write my extremely important thoughts about books." That's all I'm saying.

Oh! and I'm also saying, "This is a picture I drew. It's what I wish the words really were."

Did you miss me?

Your Latest Killers Fix

I have to say, if I were the other Killers I would be totally pissed. You all know how much I LOOOOVE Brandon Flowers, but come on! He's not the only one making the music (as this video, and frankly all the others, would have you assume). Anyhoo...here's the link to what I think may be the best track off the Day and Age album. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f76oTcUD__E. Enjoy!

I Want 10 Million of His Babies

The Killers

Best concert...ever.