Monday, January 4, 2010

Balance

1bal·ance
Pronunciation: \ˈba-lən(t)s\
Function: noun

1 : an instrument for weighing: as a : a beam that is supported freely in the center and has two pans of equal weight suspended from its ends b : a device that uses the elasticity of a spiral spring for measuring weight or force
2
: a means of judging or deciding
3
: a counterbalancing weight, force, or influence
4
: an oscillating wheel operating with a hairspring to regulate the movement of a timepiece
5 a
: stability produced by even distribution of weight on each side of the vertical axis b : equipoise between contrasting, opposing, or interacting elements c : equality between the totals of the two sides of an account
6 a
: an aesthetically pleasing integration of elements b : the juxtaposition in writing of syntactically parallel constructions containing similar or contrasting ideas
7 a
: physical equilibrium b : the ability to retain one's balance
8 a
: weight or force of one side in excess of another b : something left over c : an amount in excess especially on the credit side of an account

9
: mental and emotional steadiness

Paying particular attention to definitions 2, 5a, and 9; this word will be the driving force of my year. I find that while I am mostly happy in my everyday life, there is room to be happier. And the happiness that eludes me on those certain days seems to stem from being wildly out of balance. I either go full tilt or sleep the day away. I'm either a miser or a spendthrift. Desperately morose or obnoxiously cheerful. There is no middle ground. Moderation is not my middle name.

Well, hopefully all that will change. Taking a cue from my friend Autumn, I plan to focus on one area of my life every month. January being the month of routine, I mean to go to bed at roughly the same time every night, and wake up the same time each morning. It also means no more snooze button, and a moratorium on weekend naps. EEEK! Well, maybe not completely, I can nap on Saturday, but not Sunday...this is the year of balance after all.

I'm really looking forward to this, I'm ready for a challenge and a project. There will be false starts I will stumble many times, but this year isn't about being perfect. This year is about finding the in between; the balance between the best I have done in the past, and the best that I can do. The balance between the child that I sometimes am, and the adult I should probably start being.